Yup, that's how I felt too when I realized July had come and gone and my machines are still sitting there idle. But at least you can see why! At only 7+ months our not-so-little one is already eager to walk. It boggles the mind and taxes the body that tries to keep up!
What I have been able to accomplish is slow work on a personal favor - an at-cost cable sweater I promised to a friend, simply because A. I really felt like knitting some cables, and B. he's someone who genuinely appreciates the work. Here, a shot of the back, completed. The pattern is Shire Aran:
I've been working diligently on the front for a few weeks, stolen moments when Beautiful up there isn't actively trying to wrest the work from my hands, only to find yesterday I have to rip back to the bottom band. <sobs> I can't tell you how demoralizing that was. Under normal circumstances that would simply be a hassle, but when it takes a week just to get an hours worth of work done, it's devastating.
The setback forced me to see two things: 1. I need now to get some regular, weekly help with the baby because my vision of working while she plays by herself contentedly is a pipe dream, and 2. I have to take a break from this sweater and make something for her because I'm becoming resentful about being stuck on it. So, time for a diversion.
In closing I'll own that I could have sought help much sooner, but was nervous about leaving Beautiful with others. Now she's independent enough I'm not as concerned, but it's still such a challenge to find care providers we can deeply trust. And given that I'm not beholden to an outside employer, it's that much harder to justify.
If any parents want to share their experience with this, I'm listening! Wish me luck.